Monday, December 26, 2005

I K E......

An angry blogger writes" You just are dedicated to criticise agencies, why is it that you are myopic when it comes to seeing the clients fallacies.."

I sincerely beleive that i am not..

Because i cant afford to be one..i have been with at least two agencies, in India and abroad and have seen enlightened clients and enraging ones...

Remember the famous advice to agency guys, framed by some unknown victim..

"""When the client moans and sighs ,Make his logo twice the size.
When the client's hopping mad,Put his picture in the ad.
If he still should prove refractory… Add a picture of his factory
And if still he is in strife ,Bloody , just show his wife .."""""

The fact of the matter is that bad clients are there as bad agencies are there and most of the bad clients are so because the agencies pamper them to ridiculous extents ( forgive me my blogger friend)..accept all their tantrums.. their 'I Know Everything' attitude..(I K E)..

Togetherthey treat customers like they are a bunch of bleating buffoons..... If people feel they are being talked down to or made to look dumb, they'll think you (marketer, agency) are dumb too."Our customers are not too bright. Bad ads are OK."attitude will back fire...

Such Client agency meetings are funny .

The agency guys are pretty sure that they ’ve given the I K E what they asked for in their brief.

IKE had said after the brief “ I want you to go all out on this one. Be as creative as you like. Create a new design paradigm.”

The agency guys should have known that they have a 'not so joyous one' coming up here the moment they heard the word “paradigm,”

So they got “creative", pushing themselves to do things they’d never attempted before, and was displayingly proud of the results.

The I K E looks at the creatives and says, “wow, I like it a lot. But it’s a little way out. Can you make some changes?”

“Sure !” the creatives say, not wanting to appear stubbornly inflexible. “What would you like changed?”

I K E says, “Well, I think this yellow thing (the background) here is a bit soft. I want us to have a stronger look and feel. Can you change it to navy blue? And I want our logo over here, and larger. The logo has to be much larger. And these words here? “Get rid of them. I don’t like it. Put a photo of a guy in a suit there. Or a closeup of a computer – like they do on the other biscuit ad..And a picture of a smiling kid..emmmmmm.. thats all.. some minor changes...
what you feel..? it can be done- right?

In one foul breath, I K E has destroyed the creative and reduced it to something resembling a dreaded dream...

It can be done- right?? ... Most of agency guys know "the real meaning" when the client waxes(rarely) such utterances of diplomacy..

It can be.. and it is amazing idea...blurts the creative...


One summer, a retired old professor got a job on the railway as a supplier(the one who gets orders and supplies food, tea etc..). On his first day, he was accompanied by another supplier to learn the tricks.

"The job is really quite simple," said his tutor, "just remember to use diplomacy."

"What do you mean by diplomacy?" asked the professor, since that was something he'd never needed while teaching.

The tutor replied, "Watch me and I'll show you."

They proceeded down the train corridor, rattling compartment doors, opening them and offering tea or coffee. When the tutor flung open one door, before him stood a buck-naked woman. Without batting an eyelid, he calmly asked, "Tea or coffee, sir?"

The startled woman took a cup of coffee and he closed the door. "Wow, did you see that cutie?" said the old professor excitedly. "She didn't have a stitch of clothing on! But, why did you call her 'sir'?"

"That's diplomacy!" explained his tutor. "I didn't want to embarrass her."

The old professor was very impressed with his teacher. The following day, working on his own, the old professor flung open a compartment door and found a couple making love on the lower berth.

Remaining calm, he asked, "Tea or coffee, sir?" "Tea," replied the man.

"And for your brother?".......

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